Chapter 13: The End

Will one more day bring more happiness and less suffering from longing?

“One more day, and there will be fewer regrets. I just want to be your wife for one day.” In the morning light of the next day, Ru Xue told me this.

What is it like to be a wife? I had no idea at all. I was dragged into the room by Ruoxue, and the table in the room was already set with a steaming breakfast. Ruoxue served me a bowl and watched me eat gently.

“Being a wife means cooking for your husband every morning,” Ruoxue told me.

After the meal, I did my morning prayers. Ruoxue was busy, and I didn’t know where she found my dirty clothes. She washed them while watching me do my morning prayers.

I felt a little embarrassed because I found that she was washing my underwear that I had not had time to wash after I took it off last night. I hurriedly grabbed it, but Ruoxue told me that she was my wife today.

Is it just one day? Thinking about this, I was a little distracted, but I forced myself to put my thoughts together and not think about these sad things.

Since it’s only one day, I should live it happily. Didn’t I once tell my sixth sister that a happy day is also a happy day?

But in the fleeting moments of this day, I always wondered, is this really my wife, Chen Chengyi? Her eyes are like a picture, her tenderness is like water, the warmth of washing dishes and making soup, and the soft words of comfort, is this a dream?

In the evening, Ru Xue and I sat in a small pavilion by the lake. In front of us, there was a small stove, on which a pot of soup that Ru Xue had made for me was simmering.

Ru Xue asked to have dinner here. She said that since childhood, this lake has been her favorite place, so she had someone help her build a pavilion here. If she only had one day left, she wanted to spend it with her lover in her favorite place.

It was already early winter, and the red leaves on the mountains across the lake had not yet dispersed. In the setting sun, they were so beautiful that they made one’s heart swoon. When the wind blew, the red leaves fell on the lake, creating ripples of water, just like my heart, which at this moment was only for the woman beside me.

“Like snow?” I whispered.

“Huh?” Ru Xue snuggled up against my shoulder, her voice a little lazy.

“I thought you were asleep. Why don’t you…”

“What?”

“They all say you sing very well. Why don’t you sing me a song?” I suggested. To be honest, the past six months have been too rushed. We haven’t done many things together, and I haven’t heard Ru Xue sing yet.

“Okay,” Ru Xue replied softly.

Then, in the pavilion by the lake, looking at the red leaves on the mountains and the tranquil Moon Weir Lake below, I heard Ru Xue sing for the first time.

Half cold, half warm autumn

I am by your side

Watching the dancing light

The red leaves in the wind

arouse a feeling of endlessness in my heart

Half-drunk, half-awake

I can’t help but smile

Let me be like snow in the clouds

with ice-cold kisses gently caressing faces

Bring out a wave of lingering

How much love is left in the world

Welcome the many changes of life

Do happy things with your lover, no matter if it is fate or destiny

Like willow silk, like spring breeze

Accompany you through the spring

Let you bury your head in the mist

Let all the passion in your heart

Embraced by the spring rain

I was almost intoxicated by the snowy song, but I kept repeating the lyrics in my mind. Do happy things with your lover, no matter if it is fate or destiny. Is this what Ru Xue and I are doing? No matter what happens in the future, we love each other very much right now.

I knew the song very well, but I had forgotten where I had heard it. At this moment, Ru Xue gently placed her head on my shoulder and said, “This is an interlude from a movie we watched together. If I can really watch a movie with you every year in the future, then I will try to remember the songs from every movie.”

“Why do you have to remember?”

“Everyone says that everyone’s life has a song that belongs to their life. These are the songs that belong to my life,” Ru Xue said gently.

I squeezed Ru Xue’s hand.

The day was so hurried that it was already night in a flash. As usual, I sent Ru Xue back to her room. At this moment, my heart suddenly ached violently. After she entered the room, we would no longer be lovers. Tomorrow, I would go to the Black Rock Miao Village with my master. Tomorrow, she would stay in the village and continue her guarding.

We will be apart from now on.

All that remains is a movie every year.

“Go in,” I said to Ru Xue, looking at her. I wanted to leave quickly, afraid that I would burst into tears the next moment.

Ru Xue bit her lower lip and after a long time, she said, “Why don’t you go in with me? Today, I am your wife.”

At the end, Ru Xue’s voice was almost inaudible, but I was stunned and didn’t dare to breathe for a long time.

I understood what she meant. I asked myself if I was a鏌充笅鎯�, and I knew that lovers always want to be intimate, and even more intimate. It was just that we didn’t have a future, and I didn’t want to ruin Ru Xue’s future happiness, so…

At this moment, I almost couldn’t hold myself back, and I rushed forward to hug Ru Xue. I asked in a trembling voice, “Is it really okay? Ru Xue?”

Ru Xue’s body was trembling in my arms, and she was silent for a long time before she said, “It’s really okay. I’ve decided to never marry.”

My heart suddenly ached. Never marry? No, I don’t want Ru Xue to repeat the tragedy of Grandma Ling Qing. Under the pressure of her parents, I don’t know if I can keep her from marrying.

We are after all mortals, not the protagonists in TV dramas who live a life without earthly concerns, with nothing but love and no other feelings.

Even the most romantic love will be shattered in the face of reality.

I remembered what my sixth sister had said. She said she would try to persuade Ru Xue. I pushed Ru Xue away. Before I could even open my mouth, my heart began to ache and convulse. I took a deep breath, forced myself to hold back the pain, and said to Ru Xue in a hoarse voice caused by the pain: “Ru Xue, no, it’s not like that. We just want to love without regrets. This has nothing to do with future happiness. I’m not great, nor am I a saint. I really want to, but I can’t.”

After I finished speaking, I turned around and walked away. At the moment I turned around, my tears fell. I couldn’t do it, but there will always be someone who can. Who is that person? Who will Ru Xue make soup for on that day?

I didn’t want to think about it, but tonight, I couldn’t suppress this thought. I walked and cried, and when I reached the place where I lived with my master, I was almost unable to speak. I sat on the ladder in front of the stilt house and no longer had the strength to take a step.

At that moment, a pair of warm hands rested on my shoulder. I didn’t have to turn around to know it was my master.

A figure sat down next to me, handing me a bottle of wine. I wiped away my tears and took the bottle, gulping down a big mouthful. The rice wine in the Miao village is not very strong, but after taking such a big gulp, it burned my whole body.

I almost had an uncontrollable urge to go find Ru Xue. I thought about the fact that she would be someone else’s in the future, and that I would be someone else’s, too. We would be strangers from then on, and maybe we wouldn’t even be able to keep a promise to meet for a movie. I was heartbroken, and I felt that I should give it all up.

“That year, Ling Qing and I parted ways at the train station after we had completed a mission. At the station, Ling Qing asked me, “Are you really sure? Your master is no longer here, and even if your martial arts school no longer has you, it still has your fellow disciples. But I only have you.” The voice of my master rang in my ears.

When he said this, he didn’t look at me, but looked at the distant mountains in the distance, biting on a pipe of tobacco, and the whole person was lost in memories.

I listened quietly. This was the first time I had heard my master talk about his past with Ling Qing’s grandmother.

“I said I had thought it over, and I didn’t tell her how important the Zhongshan branch of the martial arts was. I just told her that I had many brothers and sisters, but that I only had one master who had rescued me and helped me take revenge since I was a child. The master had first entered my heart, and I couldn’t let go.” At this point, the master took the bottle of wine from my hand and took a big drink.

“Master, do you love Grandma Lingqing?” I asked with a teary voice. The pain in my heart was still burning like fire, burning me painfully.

“I’m old, so I don’t care about love. I only have one thing to say, and that is that she is the most important woman in my life. I can’t be with her, but I can give my life to her. Of course, this is me. You have parents and more responsibilities. You have to bear the consequences of your own actions in the future. This is your fate.” Master said in a low voice.

I held my head in my hands and asked Master helplessly, “What should I do? My heart hurts so much.”

“My heart was also in pain at that time. On the train back, I didn’t eat or drink, and I spent the days drinking. I also had a few serious fights with several people and was locked up by the police. But after a long time, it got better, or it didn’t hurt so much. I don’t regret it. This is all the motivation I have to support me,” the master said to me.

I don’t regret it? I suddenly felt that I had realized something, and the pain suddenly wasn’t so severe.

The two of us were silent, both drinking our wine in small sips. When the bottle of rice wine was almost empty, a piercing scream suddenly echoed throughout the village.