Chapter 67 Responsibility

Xue’s appearance undoubtedly allowed me to see a ray of sunshine in the whirlpool of sadness, illuminating my heart that had been aching.

When she let go of me, I finally couldn’t help but kneel on the ground, letting my tears flow freely, crying uncontrollably. My growth has always been accompanied by the figure of my master. How could I easily erase so many days of living together?

At this moment, all the memories of my life turned into sadness and tears, flowing down my cheeks.

This is not just my sadness, it is the sadness of everyone present. Everyone has lost the most important person in their lives, and that sadness is now resonating in the air above the Bamboo Grove, and then turning into tears for everyone.

“Sister, forgive me, just once.” Ru Yue suddenly said this, and then she hugged me from behind without regard. I froze, and then I saw Qin Huai smile helplessly and sadly, almost turning around at the same time as Ru Xue.

“Third brother, don’t move. Just pretend that you’re carrying me on your back like when we were little. When we met, Grandpa Jiang and Grandma were there. We were so brazen as to break into the Hungry Ghost Tomb because we felt that we had someone to rely on, that is, Grandpa Jiang and Grandma. They were there to save us, to tolerate our mischief, and at the end, at most, they would scold us and wouldn’t do anything to us.” Ru Yue leaned against my back and spoke in a broken voice.

I let the tears flow freely, listening to her slowly tell me: “This kind of feeling, Third Brother, I am experiencing the same as you. From childhood to adulthood, we have been dependent on each other. So how could they let us become so dependent on them, and then suddenly leave? It feels like we have been abandoned. But, Third Brother, there is one thing I have never told you. At that time in the Hungry Ghost Tomb, we got lost and encountered so many things. It was you who led us all the way until I was rescued by Uncle Hu. From that time on, you have also become my reliance. Without Grandma, without Grandpa Jiang, and without you. So, you must pull yourself together. No matter what they thought when they left, if you have the heart not to give up, you will become the reliance of everyone. Take us to find them, even if we can only see them once.

Find them, even if it’s just to see them once? My heart trembled, and I asked in a whisper, “Can we find them?”

At this moment, Chengzhen rushed to my front and said, “Chengyi, you are the successor of the Shan lineage. You are our eldest brother. My master has said since we were young that if something big happens to our lineage, the Shan lineage will have to step in and take the brunt. If you can find them, you take us to find them.”

Chengxin also came over at this time, took off his glasses, wiped away his tears with his usual elegant posture, and said, “Chengyi, you are indeed the eldest brother. They are gone, and you are leading our lineage. My master also said that no matter what happens, don’t be afraid. The Shan lineage will naturally come out to support half the sky, and the rest of our lineages only need to help you as much as possible.”

I gently pushed away Yue and wiped away the tears. I stood up and said, “I ask myself if I am immature, because until now, I am still trapped in sadness and cannot extricate myself. Why do you believe in me so much? Is it because I am from the Shan Zi Miao?”

“Shan Zi Mai, Cheng Yi, do you know why it is called Shan Zi Mai? It is because the people in the mountains are like immortals. Master once said that the reason why the ancestors of the Shan Zi Mai sect were so great was not because they favored anyone, but because the Shan Zi Mai sect was the root and the orthodox way of cultivating the Dao, and it was the way to walk the metaphysical path. And when one person achieves the Dao, all the chickens and dogs ascend to heaven. To put it plainly, it is because the Shan Zi Mai sect has finally touched something higher, and it protects the people of the other sects. Everyone who truly masters the mountain vein is destined to have a rough life, but they are also destined to have great luck behind the scenes. I don’t know what the other veins are like, but at least this vein is like this. Chengyi, take us with you. No matter how many years it takes, even if it takes a lifetime, let us see the master again, even if it’s just a tombstone. “Chengxin said to me.

At this moment, I truly understood the meaning behind this big brother. What was the reason that Master had never mentioned it to me? Was it because he didn’t want me to be bound by this responsibility?

But the responsibilities that fate has in store for us can never be avoided. We are all now without a master, like a group of people suddenly lost in the wilderness. We can’t keep going like this, so we have to set a goal and move forward. And I will undoubtedly be the one leading the way, no matter how sad I am.

I tried to speak calmly, “Let’s go in. We don’t want to be out here forever. There are two things we need to do now. First, we need to wait for Uncle Li here. He told us to wait, not to go see him. There must be a reason. So we’ll wait for him, at least until he gives us an answer. Second, as Ru Xue said, Grandma Ling Qing once gave us some instructions. Let’s hear what Ru Xue has to say about them.”

At this point, there was nothing else I could do. After calming down, I knew what I should do. People are driven to do things, especially when they have responsibilities.

Just like a mother’s responsibility to her child, it can make an innocent girl grow into a brave woman in an instant.

A father’s responsibility to his family can turn a playful boy into a mature man in an instant.

This is true for everyone when they face the responsibilities that life has given them. No matter how unwilling, sad, or evasive you are, you will eventually have to take it on. Otherwise, your life will become a meaningless waste of time, because you have never taken on anything. In this regard, even if you are a very successful person, you are still a loser.

When we entered the house, everyone sat down in the room, but Ruixue pulled me up and said to everyone, “Sorry, everyone, wait a little longer.”

I was confused and was led by Ru Xue to the place where my master and I washed ourselves. I didn’t understand what Ru Xue was doing.

Ruxue didn’t say anything, just brought a basin of water in front of me and started to wash my face. She said calmly, “Since you want to cheer up, then put on a brave face, even if it’s just an illusion, even if it’s just a little bit better, it’s good.”

As she spoke, she put down her handkerchief and smeared the shaving cream on my face. My master had left, and I hadn’t shaved for almost a week. At this time, my face was covered with a beard that was long and unkempt, and I looked as disheveled as possible.

Seeing Ru Xue carefully doing all this for me, I grabbed her. She gently pulled away from me and said, “Are you asking if I’m not sad that my grandmother has left?”

I nodded in agreement.

“I am sad, I am very sad. I was brought up by my grandma. In the village, the days I spent with my grandma were longer than the months. My grandma always said that our lives were the same. She always felt that I was suffering, and she loved me extra. For a long time, my grandma was my biggest heaven. Do you think I am sad or not?” When Ru Xue said this, she was as calm as usual, as if she was telling someone else’s story.

But she was once my closest lover, so how could I not know that her calmness often concealed too much too deep emotion. So I knew that the sadness she spoke of might not be half as bad as the sadness she felt in her heart, which she could not express.

As she spoke, Ruixue handed me the razor and said slowly, “But my grandmother told me that you will be even more upset when your master leaves without saying goodbye. So I thought I should not be upset to the point of collapse. Come here, I will support you.”

Afterwards, Ru Xue whispered to me, “Remember, wash up again and change into clean clothes before coming out. You will look better and everyone will feel better. Your parents will also feel more at ease.”

Looking at Ru Xue’s back, I felt a pang of sadness in my heart. Why couldn’t she be my wife? Perhaps a long time ago, my master had asked the same question: Why couldn’t Ling Qing be my wife?

This is fate. Even if Ru Xue is not my wife, I will not stop giving her the love that a husband gives to his wife just because she is not. This is not something that can be restricted by status. This is my passionate feeling.

Just as my master left me, I don’t know where he went, but because he is not by my side, I will not think that he is not my master. No matter where he is, he is always my master, and I want to find him, which is also my own feeling, which I will not go against.

I finally cleaned myself up as Ru Xue had asked, and then I found my mother waiting for me behind the house. As soon as she saw me, she asked, “Sanwa, is that girl Ru Xue? You and Ru Yue seem to be getting along well, and it’s confusing Mom.”

I said, “Mom, Ru Yue is my younger sister. But I’ve also separated from Ru Xue for many reasons. But I still like Ru Xue. Mom, since the master is gone, I hope you can give me a few years of freedom to do my own thing. Can you?”

My mother immediately understood what I was saying, and she was silent for a moment. She knew that I was telling her that I probably would not get married or start a family for a long time.

In the end, she sighed and said, “I’ll talk to your father about it. Hey, you’re a boy, and you’re a disciple of the immortal-like Master Jiang. Your father and I never expected you to be like an ordinary son. Ru Xue is such a good girl. Why separate?”

My mother walked away muttering, and I looked up at the sky without realizing it. How much bitterness does one have to experience in life before one’s heart finally becomes strong and calm?