Chapter 20: Master Yang?

I felt something was wrong, so I got up quietly. I was afraid that Su Rou was sleepwalking. The phenomenon of sleepwalking is not clearly explained by Taoism, but one thing is known to all: you must not wake or frighten a sleepwalker, or the consequences will be serious.

After I got up quietly, I reached the balcony and thought to myself, “Let’s see what Su Rou is up to.” But I didn’t expect Su Rou to be wide awake, staring at me with a glint in his eyes. He said in a unique Sichuan accent, “Who are you, Xiaoxiao? Why are you sneaking around behind me?”

Damn, the kid is awake! I was startled and said to Su Rou, “Kid, don’t bullshit in the middle of the night. Go back to bed quickly. You have things to do during the day.”

Su Rou frowned and said to me, “Who are you? Does this hero know you? What is the matter with you tomorrow?”

“Who do you think I am? My name is Chen Chengyi, my nickname is Sanwa, and you’ve been my best friend since you were a kid! Come on, stop bullshitting, I’m getting angry.” I was really angry. It was clear that something was wrong, but this kid could still bullshit me like this, and it was the middle of the night. He spoke in a scholarly manner, and people who didn’t know him would think he was from ancient times.

“Chen Chengyi? Never heard of him! How could he be my childhood friend? I am Yang Guo, and I beg this friend not to tease me again, or else I will not be merciful with my sword.” Su Rou said to me with a serious face, not joking at all.

Yang Guo? I felt like I was going crazy! I was both amused and worried. At this point, even I knew that Su Rou was suffering from the effects of the poison and had begun to lose his mind. I didn’t know what Grandpa Yun looked like when he was delirious, but Su Rou was good, he directly thought of himself as Yang Guo from “The Legend of Condor Heroes.”

It’s fine to think of myself as Yang Guo, but the point is that this kid can still talk to me seriously, which makes me feel so moved that I have to admire the Miaojiang’s poison, which is simply amazing, turning people into a big lunatic.

You can only talk to a madman in a madman’s way. Su Rou said he was Yang Guo, and I, a big man, couldn’t pretend to be Little Dragon Girl. I could only say to Su Rou with both hands in fists, “Yang Daxia, I have only heard of your great name for a long time, and I was just joking with you. I wonder if you can notice that this place is strange. I’m just reminding you to be careful in everything.”

I also admired myself for being able to talk seriously with a crazy person. But there was no way around it. Who could I blame if it was my brother standing in front of me? I couldn’t just ignore him. I had to coax him to sleep first.

As soon as I said this, the expression on his face changed to one of doubt and uncertainty. He looked around and said, “This is true. Where exactly is this place? It’s even more strange than the Valley of Despair. The buildings are all strange, and you can see flickering lights. Do you know anything about this?”

Well, this kid is delirious enough. I can only say, “Yang Daxia, this place is the Nanke Dreamland, and there is no way to break through it for the time being. The kid has been trapped here for 23 days and cannot get out. There is only one way to get out of here, and that is to sleep with your head covered, or you may be able to go out for a few hours a day.”

“Is this in front of you?” Su Rou looked anxious and then sighed, “I’m so poor that I have to find my aunt. I only have a few hours a day. What can I do?”

“It’s better to be able to go out for a few hours than to be trapped here all the time. I advise you to rest for now, and then think of a way out tomorrow. It’s late now, and if you don’t take the time to rest, I’m afraid you won’t be able to get out tomorrow either.” I looked sincere and patiently persuaded him.

Su Rou frowned and thought for a while, then sighed and said, “Well, I’ll go to bed now.”

I quickly took him to the bedroom and put him to bed. Sure enough, less than a minute later, the kid started snoring again. I smiled wryly and thought to myself, “You’re still Yang Guo, even if you become Yang Guo, you’re still the same old Su Rou, a big-headed, gullible fool. The real Yang Guo in the book is a man of delicate sensibilities, so how could he be so gullible? Besides, if Yang Guo were to come to a place like this, how could he possibly fall asleep? You’re lucky, you fell asleep in less than a minute.

Su Rou fell asleep, but I couldn’t sleep. I lit a cigarette and smoked it against the pillow. I hadn’t even gone to Miaojiang yet, and Su Rou had already had an attack. What would happen on the way?

And this nerve toxin is really powerful. It turned a perfectly healthy man into a lunatic. Oh, this is going to be fun. If he has a seizure while I’m in Miaojiang, how am I going to explain it to the others?

Also, I have to go see Yuan Yi, but how can I trust Su Rou? Can I take a psychotic Su Rou to see Yuan Yi?

It seems that I have to ask Qin Huai for help. With this thought, I finally fell asleep.

The next morning, I woke up early to a loud noise. I opened my eyes and saw Su Rou combing his hair seriously, wearing a pair of trousers and a shirt.

I tentatively called out, “Yang Daxia?”

Su Rou turned his head and looked at me and said, “Sanwa, who are you calling?”

I asked, “Aren’t you Yang Daxia? Then who are you?”

Su Rou ran over to me in a panic and said, “Damn it, Sanwa, what’s wrong with you? I’m Su Rou! Who’s Yang Da Xue? I said that you usually get up earlier than the rooster, saying that you want to do morning exercises. Today, you got up even later than me. You’ve been acting weird since you got up. Tell me, what’s wrong with you?”

My heart sank. This kid is Su Rou, not Yang Guo. I smiled bitterly, took out two cigarettes, threw one to Su Rou, lit one for myself, and asked, “Why did you get up so early today?”

“You forgot? Today Yun Xiaobao is treating us to dinner. It’s a fancy place. I have to get ready and get dressed, don’t I?” Su Rou saw that I was back to normal and stopped asking. This kid’s nerves must be as thick as steel.

I said, “Didn’t you just ask me why I got up later than you? I’ll tell you the truth. It was all because your son tortured me last night.”

“What?” Su Rou looked unconvinced.

So I told him everything that happened last night. After hearing it, he was no longer looking at me with disbelief, but with a look of disbelief that you were joking.

I didn’t want to say more, so I just said, “Believe it or not! I think your poison has already started to take effect. I just don’t understand why you’re not in your right mind. How could you become Yang Guo?”

When Su Rou heard me say this, he believed it. He looked very troubled with a bitter face. Later, he suddenly became energetic and said, “It’s good to become Yang Guo! How awesome! You know that I loved reading martial arts novels since I was a child, and my favorite character was Yang Guo.”

I was speechless. Is there really such a person? Don’t you think that Yang Guo was so powerful because he was handsome and had great martial arts skills? What else do you have besides your fat? What else?

The only solution now is to find Master Chen.

With this in mind, I got up, washed up, did my morning routine, tidied up a bit, and left with Su Rou. On the way, I told Su Rou what I thought.

Su Rou said to me with a nonchalant look on his face, “I don’t care anyway. I’m not worried at all. You just take care of getting me fixed up.”

Sure enough! But what can I do? Who can I blame but this kid, my best friend since childhood?

I found a public phone and called Qinhuai’s office. This kid only works three days a week, and the office phone didn’t even have him.

I was extremely bitter. I thought back on the 23 years of my life, and I had never done anything bad. How could my two best friends be like this? In desperation, I could only dial the phone numbers of several places where Qinhuai might be, and finally found him.

Qinhuai was at the home of one of our mutual friends. As soon as I called, I heard Qinhuai say, “Isn’t this a bit old-fashioned? You called me on this phone. Don’t you know I have a cell phone?”

I don’t know anything about this thing called a cell phone. I’ve only seen it used by bosses in movies. Qin Huai is really a spoiled brat. I said in a low voice, “How would I know you have a cell phone?”

Qin Huai’s voice was very surprised, saying, “Chengyi, you finally know to call me.”

I didn’t have any nonsense in mind, and I told Qin Huai everything very seriously. Then I heard Qin Huai rustling and dressing. He said, “I slept here with Zhang Tiejun. There was a woman, and I’m not sure if I should bring her home. Okay, wait for me. I’ll buy a plane ticket right away. We’ll meet in Chengdu in a few hours.

“Well, then you can look for us at Su Rou’s house. If you’re not there, just wait.” After I hung up, I felt a wave of warmth in my heart. Although Su Rou and Qin Huai are unreliable, they are really reliable people.

Qinhuai is coming over, so things shouldn’t be too troublesome.