Chapter 5: It’s time to say goodbye again

My parents didn’t expect that I would bring the key to the old house with me. When we walked into the almost abandoned house, the whole family was silent, and all kinds of feelings welled up in our hearts.

What does this old house represent? What is engraved in it? I think my family knows that this is where we recorded a period of time when we all depended on each other, and it was also the only time when the whole family was together.

Compared to the present, those days were hard, but they were also very warm. Those days will never come back…

We were wandering around the old house with no direction. Suddenly I heard my eldest sister crying. I turned around and saw her hand touching the wall, crying against it.

Obviously her crying attracted the attention of the whole family, and everyone went over to her. I was the only one who didn’t move, because I still remembered that when I left, I had carved a line on the wall.

Mom, Dad, and sister, I love you. In our hearts, we will always be together and never separate.

鈥擟hen Chengyi.

I never thought that eight years had not erased that line of words, and that it was discovered by my eldest sister today.

My eldest sister was crying, and my second sister couldn’t help but shed tears as well. My mother leaned on my father and said with a tear in her voice, “All these years, I’ve been afraid to look at this old house with you, for fear that I would think of our third child, who hasn’t been seen for so many years.”

My eldest sister cried, “My brother has had a hard life. He was never allowed to live at home, and he had to leave home at a young age. He couldn’t contact his family, and my brother was so poor…”

My sister-in-law comforted my sister, while my second sister, who was more introverted, could not say anything, but her tears fell more than anyone else’s. My brother-in-law was also busy comforting her, but compared to my sister-in-law’s military temperament, my brother-in-law was a scholar, and his personality was more sensitive. I saw him staring at the words on the wall, and his eyes were also red.

Yes, how deep was the pain of parting that made that young man carve those words into the abandoned old house?

Only my little nephew, who was in my arms, was puzzled. Why were the adults crying? I didn’t want this trip to be so sad, so I swallowed my tears back and said, “Why are you crying? I’m back, aren’t I?”

But in my heart, I was more sad than anyone else. I had lived for 23 years, and I thought the most fulfilling years were the years I spent with my family and my master in a beautiful place. But for ordinary people, this is an easy dream, but for me, it can only be a dream.

Life has always been like this. Everyone’s pursuits are so different, but some pursuits are so ordinary when placed on other people. Is this the embodiment of life’s disappointments? Therefore, we can only live in the present, cherish all that we have, and be content, because without you knowing it, all that you have may be someone else’s lifelong dream. Why be discontent?Taoist priest

Our family had lunch at the Bamboo Grove. We brought our own food, and no one expected that we would leave so early in the morning and arrive at the Bamboo Grove at 3:00 p.m.

As expected, the beautiful scenery of the Bamboo Forest Villa made my brother-in-law and sister-in-law exclaim in amazement. As expected, the layout outside the Bamboo Forest Villa had been abandoned and no one took care of it. The bamboo naturally grew wildly, and it was especially difficult for us to walk there.

Fortunately, the terrain here is so remote that no one has discovered the Bamboo Forest Cottage for so many years.

When I saw the Bamboo Forest Villa again, I was the most agitated. But I had already had too many feelings today, and I didn’t want to think about anything. I forced myself to calm down, and like a lunatic, I took a handkerchief from my luggage and began to wipe the Bamboo Forest Villa.

My behavior may seem strange to outsiders, but my parents and sisters understood. They took me by the hand and said, “After dinner, we’ll clean it together.”

By the evening, the Bamboo Forest Cottage was really cleaned by our family. I had already said that I would stay in the Bamboo Forest Cottage for a few days, and my parents insisted on staying with me, so they brought up quilts and other things.

And today, my sisters and brothers-in-law also stayed.

This night at the Bamboo House made me feel like I was back in those days, but who knows if this period of time will ever come again? Sitting on the veranda of the Bamboo House, I thought about this with a bit of sadness, and my two brothers-in-law had already developed a curiosity about me along the way.

They had of course heard my sisters talk about me, but for some reason, they were somewhat skeptical and thought it was exaggerated. After this journey, even if they didn’t want to believe it, they found it difficult to do so, so they couldn’t help but ask.

But my brothers-in-law are just ordinary people. Although I have a good impression of them, it doesn’t mean that I can tell them everything. I tried to explain the metaphysics in a scientific and less fantastic way. That’s it. It also caused my brothers-in-law to exclaim in amazement.

I stayed with my parents in the Bamboo Forest Villa for five days.

During these five days, I personally cooked for my parents. The most I ate at the Bamboo Forest Villa was bamboo shoots, fish from the stream, mushrooms, and some wild game.

Although it was difficult to cook in the mountains with nothing but the simple cooking utensils my parents brought, it didn’t affect the delicious food we ate as a family. Those flavors were the flavors I had long missed.

During the five days, I went to the Hungry Ghost Tomb once and saw a gun factory. There was almost no trace of the past, which made me feel the country’s thunderous methods.

During these five days, I also went to see the tombs of Yu Xiaohong and Li Fengxian. Sure enough, as Guo Er said, they were magnificently decorated, but what use is a magnificent tomb? These are all external things. Can the people or feelings that have disappeared ever come back?

Over the years, as I have matured, I have come to admire the relationship between Li Fengxian and Yu Xiaohong more and more. In my opinion, no matter what, there is nothing wrong with love. It is pure, whether outsiders understand it or not. No matter how this pair of forbidden lovers are viewed, in my heart, I will always selfishly weave a picture of them being together happily, without any regrets, without an ending like this, where one person is left to miss and die in a foreign land, and one person is left with resentment and a shattered soul.

A month seems like a long time, but in reality it is very short. I had a very happy month, and finally it was time to leave.

When I packed my bags and was ready to leave, it was drizzling, just like the day I left. The rainy and humid winters in Sichuan always make people sad when they leave.

My mother got up early to make me breakfast, forcing me to finish it. She also prepared a large bag of snacks that she had made herself. As a result, my luggage, which was not very heavy to begin with, suddenly became heavier by one bag.

My father sat by my side and watched me finish eating. Then he said to me, “If you can’t make it, just come back. I’m old now, and I’m not afraid of any disasters. I care more about my son.”

I was silent. I also care about my parents, no matter how old they are, I don’t want them to experience any disasters.

My mother said, “Remember to keep in touch with us. Write a letter first. This time, we spent a lot of money to get a phone installed, so your father and I will be able to call home more often. Master Jiang said that you can spend a month with us every year, but he didn’t say that you can’t contact us now. Remember to contact us.”

I nodded. This time, I will definitely keep in touch with my parents. I don’t want them to be like the past eight years, only being able to imagine their son’s life in their dreams.

“Three years later, find Master Jiang and bring him here. We miss him,” my father suddenly said.

My heart ached, and I said, “Of course. My master always says that my mother’s cooking is delicious.”

“Okay, let’s go, son,” my father said decisively, taking my suitcase and heading out.

At the door, Uncle Hu was already waiting for me in his car, but my father waved his hand and said, “Uncle Hu, you go to XX (the road out of the county) and wait for us. I’ll take my son there on my bicycle.”

This time, I was thinking of going to find the crispy pork, and Uncle Hu was going to take me to the prefecture-level city to take a bus to Chengdu, but I didn’t expect my father to take me by bicycle.

Seeing the familiar old two-wheeled bicycle at the door, I didn’t object, handed my luggage to Uncle Hu, and I, being so big, just hopped on the bicycle.

On the bike, I had to crouch because my legs were too long, which wasn’t very comfortable. Some passers-by thought it was funny and couldn’t understand why an old man was carrying a big guy on a bicycle.

But neither my father nor I paid any attention. Just like back then, the wind blew my father’s hair, which was already mostly white and only a little black. When I left that year, I was most afraid of seeing this scene when I returned, but I never thought it would come true.

I wanted to say something, but I couldn’t. I could only hear my father’s voice coming from the front: “Sanwa, in the past, I hoped you would become a great man. Now, I hope you will be safe and sound.”