Chapter 9: The most longing

Xiao Chengqian said this, which made me a little confused. I couldn’t help but slap him on the head and yell, “You don’t know, so why are you telling me shit?”

Xiao Chengqian was slapped on the head and immediately became angry. He quickly reached out to touch his hedgehog head, slapped me back, and yelled, “Even if I don’t know, you can’t slap my head!”

“What’s wrong with your head?” I was baffled. This kid didn’t have this taboo before.

“Fuck, do you think you’ve done right by me? How long has it been since I changed my hairstyle? Don’t you even look at it?” Xiao Chengqian was furious, and it looked like he was seriously grabbing my collar.

In my line of sight, Xiao Chengqian’s hair stood upright, just like a hedgehog. I don’t care about hairstyles, otherwise I wouldn’t have a natural flowing hair for thousands of years, but I really think that Xiao Chengqian’s slightly longer hair was suitable for him.

“I saw it, I saw it!” Seeing that the kid was serious, I had no choice but to beg for mercy quickly because the topic was too boring.

“That’s more like it. This hairstyle is quite manly, so that this girl won’t say that I look like a woman.” As he spoke, Xiao Chengqian couldn’t help but touch his hair with his hands again, muttering to himself, “Why is the hairspray in this county town not working? How come just now when the wind blew, I felt my hair moving with it?”

I really think this topic is damaging to my IQ, so I turned around and left. I really wanted to say, “You have 10 cm of hair standing up like this, no matter how much styling water you put on it, the wind will move it!” But in the end, I decided not to discuss such a “low-level” issue with Xiao Chengqian.

“Hey, Chen Chengyi, what are you running for? Su Chengxin said this hairstyle is good… haven’t you given your opinion yet?” Xiao Chengqian shouted behind me, unwilling to accept defeat.

My face was twitching. I thought Xiao Chengqian was about to be killed by Chengxin without knowing it. I didn’t turn around, but said, “My master asked you to talk to me, but he didn’t say when to leave. Isn’t that nonsense?”

“It should be soon. I believe Master Jiang will make the arrangements.” Speaking of this, the kid didn’t mention his hairstyle, but answered me seriously.

I waved my hand and didn’t say anything more. The meaning was already very clear, that is, the purpose of this conversation has been achieved, and I have received this matter and accepted it.

Uncle Li’s grave is in a shady spot in the Bamboo Grove. There is a reason for this. The burial site was personally chosen by Chengzhen for Uncle Li. She said that the feng shui of the Bamboo Grove is also quite good.

I don’t understand the intricacies of ‘yin zhai’ (a burial site for the deceased), but Chengzhen has been with Master Wang for so many years, so she should be right.

In the Bamboo Grove, it was a sunny, breezy day… but when I walked up to Uncle Li’s grave, the sun was a little dimmer and the wind a little stronger. I was wearing a thin jacket, and I don’t know if it was because I had just recovered from a serious illness, but I felt a little chilly.

From a distance, I saw Chengqing’s back, wearing the gray tunic he usually wore, which had become a little pale from washing, standing in front of Uncle Li’s tomb.

The wind blew the hem of Chengqing’s clothes and his hair, which was almost shoulder-length… The few white hairs in his long hair were so glaring and seemed so desolate and lonely.

In my memory, I have never seen such a desolate back. Chengqing’s back gave such a strong shock that I experienced the artistic conception of desolation for the first time so clearly.

I walked over gently, and the sound of my shoes rubbing against the grass came. Chengqing didn’t even turn around, but asked softly, “Chengyi?”

I didn’t want the atmosphere to be so solemn, so I deliberately smiled and said, “Brother Chengqing, how could you know without turning around? Did you calculate it?”

“Do you need to calculate such a trivial matter? Everyone’s footsteps are different. I have a little problem, which is that I love to listen to people’s footsteps and remember this rhythm. Like my master, every time he raises his foot, there is a slight pause, as if he is considering every step and not making a mistake, but when he steps, it is exceptionally powerful, because you can hear it clearly from the sound of the landing.” Chengqing’s voice was faint.

At this time, I had already walked up to Chengxin’s side. He had a slight smell of alcohol on his breath, and he was holding a wine glass in his hand. There was also a bamboo tube on the ground, which contained wine, and next to it, there was another bamboo tube lying on its side.

I deliberately bent down, picked it up and shook it. There was still a little bit of residual wine inside. I sighed and put down the bamboo tube in my hand.

My master often used this kind of bamboo tube to pour wine. One section is about a catty. Could it be that Chengqing drank all that by himself? He drank a catty of wine without stopping? He could get into trouble!

Thinking this way, I grabbed Chengqing’s wine glass and drank it down… Because of my injury, I hadn’t touched alcohol for a long time. The spicy wine flowed down my throat and I coughed repeatedly.

Chengqing took the wine glass from my hand slowly and said calmly, “You shouldn’t drink when you’re injured.”

“Then you should drink that much?” I was vaguely angry. I understood Chengqing, but I felt that he shouldn’t be so sad. Yes, Uncle Li is gone, but he still has us… Even if we can’t replace Uncle Li in terms of affection, it’s impossible to replace him, but what does his loneliness mean? It seems…

I couldn’t say this. I couldn’t say why Chengqing had to be so lonely at this time. It was as if the fun was ours, the warmth was ours, and he was just alone.

In response to my question, Chengqing sighed and said to me, “I didn’t really drink that much. Look at the floor.”

After that, he pointed to a place. I looked and saw that the ground was indeed wet and there was a strong smell of alcohol. That should be the smell of the wine spilled on the ground.

I looked at Chengqing and didn’t know what to say. He poured a glass of wine from the bamboo tube and began to recite aloud: “The past is only sad, and it is difficult to arrange the scenery. The autumn wind and courtyard moss invade the steps. Who will come all day long…”

I didn’t understand Chengqing’s behavior, so I could only listen quietly. I knew it was supposed to be a Song Dynasty poem, but I didn’t know whose it was. I didn’t understand why Chengqing was reciting it at this time.

Chengqing didn’t intend to explain to me, but just recited the poem in a somewhat lonely voice. After he finished, he spilled the wine in the cup on the spot, then poured another cup, and drank it all in one gulp. Then he said with a smile on his lips, “Wine and food go together, but who knows that sometimes good words, whether they are Tang poetry, Song poetry, Yuan opera, or even an essay, are the best accompaniment to wine? My master loved Song poetry, and under his influence, I also love Song poetry. The poem I just recited is a poem by Li Yu, the last emperor of the Southern Tang Dynasty. My master loved his later poems the most. The ups and downs of life, the struggle to find the truth from deep sorrow, the struggle to find inner peace, but unable to escape, he felt like a portrayal of the world, but the rare thing in the world is a heart that wants to understand.

I listened quietly to what Chengqing said, and also looked at the flush of wine on his face. He is such a calm person, and such emotions are very rare. Sometimes it is not a bad thing to let emotions out. All I need to do is really just listen quietly.

Chengqing was only going to tell me, and his lonely voice continued to echo in my ears: “Chengyi, do you know? Master said that he may not have a long life because he is bound to a certain position, but he has a heavy responsibility. When I have time to relax, I always like to drink with me, singing and drinking, and drinking to my heart’s content… We are used to it, a poem, a glass of wine, just like drinking a thousand flavors. Now, I just want to spend some time with him again.”

“Chengyi, you will surely blame me. You are so concerned about my heart, but I am so lonely and desolate. Have I hurt your hearts? In fact, no, it’s not like that! That year, even though Master knew he wouldn’t make it, do you know what he said to me?” Chengqing’s eyes were covered with a layer of mist.

“What did he say?” The hot breath from the wine just now came from my stomach, but for some reason, I still wanted another drink. I couldn’t help but pick up the bamboo tube from the ground and gulp it down. In fact, I also miss Uncle Li, that serious man who is just like Chengqing, who never shows his emotions, but is exceptionally loyal.

Otherwise, how would he know exactly what I did when I was studying in Beijing?

Indeed, people are most afraid of missing out on love. If you can’t recall the details of the past, you’ll get stuck!

“He said that he didn’t have much time left. At first, he was very worried that I would be lonely, but after the gathering in Beijing, he never worried about it again. He said that although they were disciples of the same master, they were different in appearance but the same in heart. I followed him, but he absolutely believed that the masters had the same feelings for me as he did. My own brothers and sisters also had a pure heart. Old Li’s school did not accept people who did not understand the word “love,” even if they were trapped by love for a lifetime! This love naturally includes the love of the martial arts… He said that he was lucky to have entered the door of Old Li, and that I must not miss him too much after he was gone, or I would disappoint you all. After saying this, Cheng Qing didn’t pour any more wine into his glass, but instead, like me, he grabbed the bamboo tube and took a big drink.

Then he said, “Actually, I have been following you all the way to find my master, and I have been thinking about him. According to what my master said, this kind of thinking has fallen on my three uncles. If I find them, I will find my master!”

After saying this, Cheng Qing’s body almost couldn’t stand up, and I helped him up.