Chapter 86: A Farewell
Guan Rui disappeared from Shen Xing’s life. Shen Xing felt as if she had lost almost everything in life. She felt that she had not died with Guan Rui because she was still worried about Guan Rui’s parents.
Until one day, Guan Rui’s parents ‘kicked’ Shen Xing out of the house.
It was not maliciously that they wanted to drive Shen Xing out, but the two kind-hearted old people felt that Shen Xing was almost “obsessed” with their son and would ruin her life in the future, so they hardened their hearts, endured their grief, and no longer accepted Shen Xing’s care, and they “kicked” her out.
At that time, Shen Xing felt that her life was coming to an end, but a sentence from her boss gave her new hope.
It was a quarrel out of anger, because Shen Xing was about to give up her life, so she didn’t care about anything.
But because of that argument, she accidentally heard the boss say, “Life is always full of disappointments. If you want everything to go your way, go to the ghost market. If you want to live a life of misery at the company, go to the ghost market and get your man back.”
Shen Xing’s company is a very large multinational company. The boss’s experience of making a fortune is mysterious and full of legend. The boss, who is attracted to the capable Shen Xing, may think that subordinates who give up a promising future for a relationship and don’t care about their work are extremely ‘hateful’.
Maybe ordinary people don’t take this seriously, or they imagine that the ghost market is nothing more than a trading market, and they don’t care at all. But Shen Xing cares. She is a smart woman. She knows some stories about the boss’s fortune, which are too legendary. She vaguely deduces that all this has something to do with the ghost market.
Next, there was a long period of searching. For half a year, Shen Xing searched for the so-called ghost market that the boss had mentioned. She was a smart girl, and in those six months, her intelligence was brought to the extreme. The ghost market, which was supposed to be extremely secretive, was actually located by Shen Xing!
The details don’t need to be explained in detail. In short, after going through a thousand hardships, Shen Xing finally made it to the ghost market, where she exchanged ten years of her life for important clues.
Following the clues, she found Master Liu and gave him ten years of her life in exchange for a year of his daughter’s life. She finally found Guan Rui!
Master Liu used secret techniques to summon Guan Rui’s soul and told Shen Xing that Guan Rui should have entered the cycle of reincarnation because he was not a lonely ghost and was already on the verge of entering the cycle of reincarnation. His secret techniques were a means of deception, and Guan Rui’s soul must be carried by a living body in order to deceive the heavens.
And in two years at most, Guan Rui must leave, otherwise he will never have another chance to reincarnate.
What was the final outcome? Guan Rui’s soul met Shen Xing and expressed a willingness to accompany Shen Xing for another two years, and Shen Xing used his own body to carry Guan Rui’s soul.
During this period of time, it was a painful time. You can’t imagine what it was like to be together like that. Two people in love sharing the same body, so close together, but unable to even hug each other. During this period of time, Guan Rui’s biggest advice to Shen Xing was to let go of herself and start a new life.
Shen Xing always smiles and says yes, but in her heart she has already made up her mind. Once Guan Rui’s soul leaves, she will follow it, even if they can’t meet again.
Because Master Liu gave Shen Xing an example. People meet by fate. If your fate is over in this life, then even if you have a deep relationship, you will not meet in the next life. It doesn’t mean that if you have a deep love, you will definitely meet each other.
Shen Xing wanted to leave for two reasons. The first was that in this life, she would definitely not let Guan Rui down. The second was that without Guan Rui, what was the point of living in this world?
This reminds me of the first time I saw Shen Xing. No wonder I couldn’t feel the presence of a ghost. It was in Shen Xing’s body. This kind of secret technique that can deceive even the heavens is normal to deceive me.
And her strange listening smile was the result of two souls in her body having a conversation! And why did she later become keenly aware that my spiritual powers were incredibly strong? It was because she had a real ghost in her body.
When I was very young, I heard my mother tell me the story of Widow Zhou, and I knew that ghosts have a pair of ‘eyes’ that are different from those of humans. They can see something special!
But in any case, what a strange thing this is happening in the city! Two souls of people in love are hidden in one body!
But even this kind of coexistence is not long-lasting. Shen Xing thought it could last two years, but the soul needs to be in harmony with the body, which depends on fate and so on. Obviously, Shen Xing’s body was not so harmonious with Guan Rui, and he was miserable every day, ready to enter the cycle of reincarnation at any time. He quietly begged Master Liu not to tell Shen Xing, using secret techniques to keep himself. He felt that Shen Xing had not let go of herself.
But one time, such a conversation was overheard by Shen Xing. Of course, she couldn’t hear what Guan Rui was saying, she could only hear Master Liu’s monologue, but she could always tell what was going on. She heard words that could scatter her soul if she were not careful.
It was the day before she was to take us on our journey.
At that time, Shen Xing decided to let Guan Rui leave. It can be said that traveling with us was the last stop in her life plan, and she was so determined.
The conversation I saw between her and Master Liu was when she asked Master Liu about this matter. It was already at the end of the conversation and I heard it.
At the end of the diary, there is a passage in which Shen Xing writes to Brother Chengxin. That is Shen Xing’s true account to Brother Chengxin.
Su Chengxin:
If one day you finish reading this diary, you may understand why I did it.
Perhaps the only thing you can’t understand is that since I was determined to die, why did I decide to be greedy and spend one day with you? This was a decision I made before I asked Master Liu to spend one day with you.
In fact, I can’t give you a complete answer to this question, because there is one thing in this world that makes no sense at all, and that is love at first sight.
It is not something based on appearance or external conditions, but there is someone, and when he appears, your heart beats.
I love Guan Rui. Our relationship has endured the test of time and hardship. It has never been dramatic, but it has a solid foundation.
Was it love at first sight for me? I think I can’t use the word love, because my love has already been given to Guan Rui. I just have a heartbeat when I first see you. Is that a heart? Or am I destined to have a truly intense love if I don’t end my life? Is it the kind of love that is decided at first sight?
I don’t know. I’m very conflicted.
But no matter what, I can’t desecrate the love between me and Guan Rui, and desecrate the deep devotion he has for me.
But I still fantasize about starting a new life with you.
Sometimes, I wonder if I’m a bad woman. I always think I am… How can I love a man other than Guan Rui in my life?
No, no, I can’t accept it!
But, would a new life be beautiful?
I don’t know, I don’t know…
This paragraph ends in such a messy way because the owner’s mood is very messy, so the handwriting in this paragraph is also messy, unlike Shen Xing’s previous diary, which is so neat and clean! It can be seen that until the end, Shen Xing had not made any decisions…
The feeling of love at first sight is indeed an irresistible feeling. People can be rational and have strong self-control, but how can human feelings be controlled?
On the other hand, there is the love that has been nurtured over the years. How can you desecrate that?
Keep this love alive, or start a new happy life…?
I held the diary in my hands and imagined myself in such a situation. What would I decide? Unfortunately, I really couldn’t think of an answer. I could only say that at that time, any decision was full of chance factors, and there was no way to give an answer in advance.
The next morning, I was sitting on the stairs with Chengxin, looking at the morning glow, both of us in silence.
Before that, I had already told Chengxin about the story of Shen Xing and the last words of Shen Xing.
Then, there was this silence.
“It’s really hard to choose. Guan Ling is very good, very good…” It was Cheng Xin who broke the silence first.
“What? Are you regretting interfering with someone else’s perfect love?” I asked.
“No, when Shen Xing saw my heartbeat for the first time, when I saw her for the first time, didn’t I have a special feeling? If not, even if she was so good, I wouldn’t have fallen in love with her so quickly, would I?”
“That doesn’t make sense. They both fell in love at first sight!” I said, but I kept thinking about Ruoxue and that line, “Acquaintance is no accident. We were bound from the moment we met. Isn’t that true for me as well?”
“No matter what, she’s gone.”
“Do you want to meet her in the next life? Or give the opportunity to Guan Rui?”
“People who can fall in love at first sight have accumulated many lifetimes. Shen Xing and I are the ones who are meant to be together in the next life, and I won’t let anyone else have her. I… I just want to see her a little earlier and give her the warmth that Guan Rui gives her.” Chengxin said seriously.
I looked at Cheng Xin Ge in surprise, but he said to me in all seriousness, “Only more, not less!”